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16% sheepishly replied, "yes." Do some of you wish it had been sooner? " Meanwhile, 37% wish it had been with someone else, 9% wish they had taken off their shoes, and a staggering 6% wonder if their first time would have been better if they had just turned off Aerosmith. What's the point of being bisexual if your numbers are going to be so low? Crabs = 2% Herpes = 1% Chlamydia = 1% Genital Warts = 1% Gonorrhea = 0% Syphilis = 0% I Gave 'Em! Having sex with the differently-abled floats (3%) of our respondent's boats, while an impressive number of Portlanders (24%) are doing their bit for unity by jumping the bones of someone from a different race! Whether giving or receiving, a "rim job" (or "tossing the salad" if you prefer) is the haute couture of modern sexuality! "In the year 2000, I..." Gave a rim job = 26% Got a rim job = 27% Refused to give a requested rim job = 4% Was refused a requested rim job = 4% See? That's why our slogan here at the Mercury is "Need a rim job?

Even more specifically, do you wish you had waited till you were older? And by "sex" the Mercury has chosen to include oral sex, anal intercourse, vaginal intercourse, and even good ol' handjobs. We're really not shocked that gay men average 127 partners. But don't forget, gays: Your promiscuous lifestyle is screwing up the curve for everybody else. But even more importantly, what's up with the bi women? But you gotta admit those are pretty e Still others got their groove underway with a visiting repair man/woman (2%), a delivery person (1%), or--always a popular choice for the lazy--someone from work (20%)! Britney Spears (43%) defeats Christina Aguilera (35%)! Ricky Martin (41%) makes menudo out of Marc Anthony (22%)! And finally, the extremely hot 'n' sexy Mercury staff (300,000%) once again outshines and gets five times more rim jobs than the dowdy, frumpy, dried-up librarians at Willamette Week (-2%).

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